Too Old To Blow?

July 19, 2006

So yesterday was my dad's birthday, and I realized something kind of important. Ok. Maybe not important. But nonetheless I realized something. Or more than realized something, I wondered something.

At what age do you suddenly stop being expected to blow out your age in candles? When does it become "too much." And why is it ever really "too much" when all it ever is is one more candle than last year?

My dad turned 58 (I think.) But there were not 59 candles on the cake. You want to know how many there were? Two. That's right. Two! My mom explained it to me like this...candle #1 was for his total years of age (how does that work!?) and the other (candle #2) was the " 1" for good luck. What?

And why? Is it because candles are expensive when you have to buy several packs? Or are they just too hard to light all at once? Or do you worry about the blower-outer and the humiliation of the year that finally gets the best of them?

It just seems unfair that a 30 year old might be expected to blow out 31 candles while everyone stares you down and laughs when you run out of breath at 22. But then there's the 31 year old at the table next to you at The Olive Garden that night who just might be given the "two candle" option instead.

I'm just saying...I think that we should set an age to instill the easier candle-blow-act so that this is no longer a problem. And I do think this is a problem...it's just one that no one discusses. You're welcome for bringing it to the table...